I had a friend once tell me I was crazy and I was all like, "what me!?" and he was like hell yeah! But, I've never slashed a tire, called the cops on a guy for no reason, broke a belonging or popped up at someone's house! How the hell was I crazy? He couldn't give me anymore than "Well, you're not THAT kind of crazy", so what is MY kind of crazy?
My particular type of crazy stems from the unknown, but isn't that a basic human trait? If someone told you to stick your hand in a box, you would want to know what the hell was in it first right? Right!? I mean, what if it's the SAW V box and you pull your hand back only to find something inside the box ate it. So here are some common things I know I've done that even my male friends think are completely sane that other men have perceived as crazy.
1. Made myself emotionally available: i.e "Hi, I really like you and I would like to spend more time with you. When can I see you again? " How the fuck is that crazy? If you like someone aren't you supposed to take the chance and make yourself available if you aren't into playing games? It's called be honest for God's sake. But men hear "Hi, I really like you, can I have your babies and can we run off to a castle and live happily ever after with Tinker Bell and the crew?" However, I didn't say all that. What I said was "I would like to get to know you better and see if this can be real." That's it.
2. Sent a text message: By sent a text message, I mean "Hey how are you?" After not hearing from you for a few days, or even a day! Who cares!? It was ONE freaking text message! To make it better, the kicker is they were probably texting me on a DAILY basis and I didn't hear from them and decided to check in. Is that so wrong? Do I always have to wait for you to text me first? WTF? If you don't want to talk to me anymore just say that shit!
3. Provided my own closure: If you haven't noticed yet, I like to write. Writing is somewhat of a release for me and if I feel a real connection with someone and they disappear with no warning, I have been known to write the "Sayonara" text or hand deliver a letter when possible. This is perhaps the ONLY thing I could see someone thinking is crazy, but I don't do it for the reason they think. I do it because I have been FORCED to create my own closure because boys are cowards and avoid having that real conversation face to face at all cost. My writing is a way for me to say EXACTLY how I feel about the situation and get all the words out I never had a chance to say before. It provides me a release and a way to move on without becoming the bitter, jaded woman I have been fighting back for years. That's all.
4. Allow myself to have a real connection: Yes, I'm human and I want something that will eventually lead to a healthy loving relationship so I try not to shut myself completely down. So, shoot me.
5. Push to find out what's really going on: Once again, if you don't want to talk to me TELL ME! I'm not saying if I went out with you once and didn't even kiss you I need to hear from you, but if you were all Prince Charming and we talked about some real shit and the last time I saw you everything was honky dory, I'm going to want to know why you dropped off the face of the Earth. It isn't cool to give me some vague ass answer like "I don't feel well", tell me what the hell is up! Otherwise, I'll be stuck in some limbo between waiting and saying fuck it. That limbo is mad uncomfortable and not fair. So, hell yeah I'm going to ask what's really going on because I want out of limbo!
6. Do nice things for a man: Once again, men, get it out of your head already! I am NOT trying to have your baby, I am NOT trying to marry you in 3 months or less I am showing you REAL interest. Maybe you popped into my head and I thought "It would be nice to give him a massage, he's had a hard week, he may like it." Is that really crazy? NEWS FLASH, I'm not selfish! That's what it's called, selflessness. I actually think about other people every once in awhile.
So, that's where my friend from Huffington Post comes back into play. He said, men don't trust the EMOTIONS of women. Men automatically feel like women are either lying to them or they're overreacting, but we aren't! The problem is that men assume they know what the emotions and intentions of a woman are without listening to what they say or do. To be clear, if that chick throws a brick through your car window, she cray-cray, but if she sends you a text saying she wants to see you, she probably just really likes you. It would be beneficial to BOTH parties if you either told her upfront you aren't digging it OR decide to be a real man and protect the heart of a real woman and let your guard down. Go meet her and see where the hell it goes! Maybe in the end, you'll end up with a really good friend or partner, maybe not, but at least you'll both know why it didn't work out. Just tell her what's in the damn box BEFORE she sticks her hand in it.